A Broken Spirit
by The Vampire Pony
Summary: Warning: Child Abuse, but I hope I didn't put too much detail I tried . Basically, Edward has been abused by his parent's too long. He runs away finally, and meets the Cullen's a little at a time. Will he fit in? Will his parents find him again? Find out
1. Chapter 1

I was asleep. Dreaming. It was always the best part of the day, those few hours I slept. It was nice to just lay in bed and sleep for four hours. I especially loved it when I wasn't dreaming. That was nice, the most restful sleep I got was when I didn't dream. When I dreamt, I had nightmares, every time. It sucked. Tonight was one of the bad nights, I was dreaming. The dream was about the same as usual.

_I was running on a street, but going no where. They were gaining on me. My mom had a knife in her hand, and my dad just had those fists. I feared my dad more. He was the one who would hurt me the worst. I pushed my legs harder, but I still wouldn't get anywhere. They were so close now. I called for help out to a blond man looking out a window, but he just grimaced for me and kept watching. A brown haired woman peeked her head out a door, and I called for help again. She just put a hand to her mouth in horror. _

_I turned around then. My parents were right behind me. They advanced on me with their weapons. I tried to back away, but I fell. I saw my mother's hand come down with that knife, and I cringed with expectancy._

Pain shot through my side as something slammed into me real hard. I yelped aloud. I was still tender in my ribs from being woken yesterday the same way. I looked up fearfully at my father. He was the moron I was named after. I hated his guts. Although, you would never be able to tell with the way I acted. I tried to act like a perfect little angel, but it was never good enough for them.

"Get up," he said gruffly.

I winced as I got up to my feet as quick as I could. My head swam and my body screamed at me in protest. I ignored it. I had gone years with ignoring pain, that wasn't going to stop today.

"You better listen to your mother today. If I hear you didn't, you won't feel the end of it." My father vowed.

Yesterday, I had tried to rebel against my mother's hand. She was always the least mean one, and I always tried to get away with things with her. Sometimes I succeeded. However, yesterday I had gotten too cocky and had received a beating from her and my father. I didn't want a repeat of that experience.

"Yes, sir." I said it with as much respect I could muster. It came out sounding a little more like a groan of pain. My throat really hurt. I hadn't had water in a while, and the only thing I had eaten for the past four days was a bit of bread last night when I had mustered up the courage to sneak it.

I saw the punch coming before it hit me. I flinched in preparation, and covered my head with my arms. It hurt to even cower. The blow hit me hard in the stomach. It was hard enough for me to taste the blood in my mouth.

"That's just a taste of what you'll get tonight if you misbehave even a little bit." My dad sounded drunk. His voice was too rough, and his words were too slurred. No wonder his hits didn't hurt as bad as usual. He probably could barely see me.

He thrusted a piece of paper at me. His fist collided with my chest. I felt the wind go out of me for a second. While I was still catching my breath I grabbed the paper. It was the list of chores I would have to do today.

My dad lumbered out of the room. As soon as I heard the front door slam - meaning he was off to work - I let myself fall back into the couch. I hurt bad. I was certain my ribs were broken, and my leg felt the same. My shoulder felt almost too sore to move it. It hurt to breath. This seriously sucked. What could I do though? It wasn't like I could fight back. I was only a scrawny, skinny seventeen year old boy. I couldn't go up against a strong, mean, well-fed 38 year old or his dumb 36 year old wife. I couldn't tell anyone either. They would kill me. Once, I had threatened to call the police. I was only thirteen and the brutal behavior had only been going on for six years. I didn't know what they would or could do to me yet. That was the first time they had actually beaten me like they do now. Before, they had only given me a good kick to the ribs or a slap across the face. The worst they had ever gotten before was my dad stomping on my chest until he couldn't hear me breathing any more. Oh how I wished I had that back.

I sighed, and got up. I heard my mother getting up. If she caught me just sitting here after I had already received my list of chores, she would do something or tell my father. I dreaded any day I did something wrong in my mother's eyes. She would always tell father. It was better when he was drunk. The beer seemed to mellow him out. However, he only ever got drunk once every three weeks.

The first chore on the list was simple: feed the dog. We had a vicious guard dog. It liked me, and I would play with it when my mom wasn't looking. It was my only companion in the world, but even it turned on me sometimes. Once, I was sitting on the porch, and it came up to sit next to me. I reached my hand up to scratch its ears, and it bit me. It has bitten me several times since then, but I don't care. It treats me better than either mother or father.

I grab the bowl and fill it with food in the pantry. The dog actually gets real food. It gets steak and vegetables smothered in gravy. Its morning like today that I sneak some of its food for myself. I grab a handful of dog food for myself before leaving the pantry. On my way outside, I eat the delicious morsels. I hadn't had any time to sneak food in a while. Mother had been getting up with Father lately for some reason, and it always seemed like one of them was breathing down my neck.

When the dog was fed, I headed for the house but stopped dead. Mother was standing in the doorway. She looked irritated. I prayed to anyone who was listening that she hadn't seen me eating the dog's food.

"Edward," she said sharply.

"Yes, ma'am."

"I need you to go clean yourself up. Cover those bruises or make up a good story, I don't care. I want you to look presentable in front of my friends." With that she left.

I mentally jumped in the air with relief. I had the morning off from chores. Not only that, when my parents threw parties I always got to eat. Sure it sucked because I would have to stay up real late doing chores, but I would do them well rested and full of food.

I dashed off to my bedroom. It had a pile of blankets on the floor and a little nightstand next to the blankets. That was where all my nice clothes were. I reached into the little nightstand, and pulled out a slightly formal outfit. It was formal enough for everything that my mom ever planned, but casual enough for my comfort. It also covered my bruises nicely. I hated that about this outfit. It was more to my mother's liking than my own. I put it on, and set about covering the bruises on my face.

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	2. Chapter 2

I stood in the parlor with my mother. We were waiting for guests to show up. She would leave to host as soon as the first guests arrived, but I would stand here until every guest was inside. I didn't care, it beat doing all those ridiculous chores and beatings any day.

I also knew that quite a few of mother's friends took pity on me. They didn't know what happened in our house, but a few of them always noticed I would favor a leg or look paler or skinnier than the last time they had seen me. They also always noticed my scratchy voice from lack of water. Usually only one or two of Mother's friends would notice at least one of these things, but Mrs. Swan always noticed it all. After the first time she had pulled me aside during one party to ask me about a limp I had had from my dad crushing my leg, she had always watched me closely when she came over and always brought me special treats she had cooked in her kitchen. It was such a huge relief when she was invited over. I wished she had been invited over today, but Mother seems pretty suspicious about her, so I don't think that will happen anytime soon.

There was then a knock at the door. Mother gave me a warning look the way she always did before guests entered the house, telling me not to say anything. I nodded in understanding and pulled open the door to let two women come inside. I held out my hands to them to help them up the small step and through the threshold.

"Thank you dear," they both said almost at the same time. I nodded respectively.

"My, Edward, when was the last time you saw some sun? I tell you this all the time, but it's not good for a boy to stay in the house reading all day," Miss Muriel said disapprovingly. "Elizabeth, you need to force this boy out of the house sometime."

"I know. I just can't force him to do anything. He's like his father that way, so stubborn," Mother said. I gritted my teeth; I did this anytime I was compared to my father. "May I lead you to the living room; it's not very comfortable standing around in the hottest room in the house."

With a few 'yes's, those three left me alone in the parlor. It was very warm in here, and I found myself sweating before too long. My ribs were starting to bruise, too. I could feel it starting to ache every time I took a breath in. My chest and sides were starting to burn from the unnecessary beatings I had gotten when I had woken up.

For the next few moments, guests entered and I lead them to the living room each time. When most of the guests were in, I was already panting. My chest felt really tight, and I had already looked in the mirror in the bathroom to see how bad I was bruised. It turned out my bone was broken in my chest. Through my skin, I could see my bone all bent out of shape. I was glad when I let in the last guest. I couldn't take any more physical activity. However, when I turned to leave the parlor I heard another knock on the door. Groaning, I pulled open the door. Mrs. Swan stood there in the doorway.

"Hello, Edward," Mrs. Swan said.

"Hello, Mrs. Swan," I returned the greeting, offering my hand like I had done with all the rest of the women.

"Nonsense Edward. I have two legs, and can help myself through the door. Besides, you look exhausted. Why don't you have a seat," she said gesturing to two chairs in the corner of the room.

"I'm fine," I said. I mustered up enough air to sound normal. I didn't want her getting alarmed and asking my parents about me. That would surely cause them to hurt me.

"Alright." She eyed me suspiciously. "I heard your mother was having a party. I came over to see for myself, but that's a secret, okay?"

I nodded. "They're where they usually are for parties," I stated simply.

She nodded and kissed my cheek. "Thank you Edward," she said before walking off towards the living room.

I sighed and sat in the one of the chairs in the corner. I sat there until my breathing was as normal as it would get before I left the parlor finally. I stepped into the living room, and took a free seat. All the women were talking amongst themselves. One of them eventually turned to me.

"Edward," she said. "Do you still play the piano?" It made sense she would ask this question. I had just overheard a few of the women wishing to hear some music.

"Yes, ma'am," I responded.

"Could you play a piece for us?"

"Of course."

"Something light and happy please," someone else requested.

I got up, and walked to my piano in the corner. I had received it as a gift from one of my aunts now dead. It was a beautiful antique and was supposed to be in my family for ages. I rarely got to play it nowadays, but when I was able to, I would play and play and play. I would play anything from Beethoven to my own pieces. I thought I wasn't too bad of a composer and I usually pleased guests with my compositions as well. It was the only thing I got to do that I enjoyed. It was a stress reliever as well as a way to express myself without having to talk to someone. Because of it as being my only way to express myself, most of my pieces were pain based, but beautiful all the same.

I sat down at the instrument and felt immediately at home. My long fingers stroked the keys and I started to play. It wasn't anything new, simply a piece I had written years ago. I new it by heart. It was based on the only human friend I had ever had: the only happy song I had ever composed. The song twisted around one set of notes common throughout the whole song. They were light, happy notes. The rest of the notes spoke of love and mischief.

When I was finished, the women clapped politely and went back to their talking. I stayed at the piano, however. Thoughts were buzzing around my head of a happier time when I had had friends and when my parents weren't so mean. I got up irritated from my piano to sulk outside. I didn't want to throw a temper tantrum in front of the guests.

I sat down in the grass outside. My ribs continued to ache, and I knew I needed to see a doctor. There were a lot of things I needed to see a doctor for, things that had already healed, but were crooked. I knew I would probably get another broken bone tonight for something. I always got beat when father came home, even if there was nothing reasonable to get mad at me about. Why was I so angry all of a sudden about my life. I had usually just accepted everything they gave me. Maybe it was that song on the piano, or seeing Miss Swan again. All I knew was that I suddenly wanted to escape. It was like I lived in a black veil away from the rest of the world. I couldn't wait to turn eighteen to leave this life. Was I even guaranteed they would let me leave when I was eighteen? No, I wasn't.

I got up from my sitting position and walked back into the house. I was leaving. While my mom was distracted with her guests, and my dad wasn't here to stop me, I would leave. It was the perfect opportunity. Once I was in my room, I packed my ID, the little money I had, and some clothes into a backpack. I changed out of my clothes and into some more comfortable ones, wiped the make up off that I had used to cover my bruises and scars, and put on a pair of worn tennis shoes. And I left, just like that.


	3. Chapter 3

I had my backpack slung over one shoulder as I walked. I was in a forested area and was unsure of where I actually was. I could have even left the U. S. A. and not known it. I was just happy I was out of Chicago, and I knew for a fact that I was out of Illinois because a week back I had seen a sign stating I was entering Iowa. I didn't know if I was still in Iowa; I hadn't traveled near any roads in a while. I knew by now that my parents would have reported me missing to the police, and anyone could recognize me. I wasn't taking that chance. I was as good as dead if I was dragged back home.

_How lucky am I? I can't go back home for fear of being killed by my own parents, _I thought bitterly.

As I continued to walk. I got more and more curious about where I was. Eventually, I decided I'd try to go near a road or city to figure it out. When I heard voices, I started walking more quietly and more cautiously. When I could see the city, I hid among some bushes, and looked for some sort of indication of where I was. Mainly, I looked at banks, for I knew that I had a good chance of coming across a bank named after the state I was in. When I couldn't spot any bank or other indication of where I was, I decided to head into the city. First, I looked around for cops. When spotting none, I walked cautiously into the city.

I got a lot of strange looks as I walked the streets. I could tell everyone thought I was homeless and some even looked at me with pity. I ignored all stares. I already knew that I was covered in dirt and I still looked bruised and broken. I also knew I was really skinny. My clothes were hanging off my thin frame, and I felt even thinner when I walked by a restaurant giving off delicious scents. I looked casually in this restaurant. There were a few people in there, and what they were eating was making my mouth water. Steaks, potatoes, pastas: I felt my stomach clench and ache with hunger at the sight. I walked off before I became a beggar.

After walking around the town for what felt like an hour, I sat on a bench by a bus stop. My feet hurt, and I was awfully tired. I pulled my money out of my pocket. I didn't have much, but I was certain I could get into a hotel for at least one night with what I did have. Picking up change on the streets, and shining people's shoes didn't get you a lot of money all at once, but after a while, it started to collect. In fact, I had a good fifty dollars.

I got up from my seat to wonder around in looks of some place to stay for the night. Not long after I had started to search, I found a motel. After staring at the sign for a while, I was finally able to see the motel was called the 'Lazy L Motel'. I walked into what I hoped was the front lobby. A nice looking woman was there to greet me at a desk. When I had given her enough money for one night, she gave me a key to room 5. I said my thanks before leaving the lobby.

The room I entered was fairly comfortable. It was a mediocre motel with the regular things a motel would have: basically, a bed, a bathroom, a TV, and a nightstand. I let myself fall onto the bed. My aching body immediately began to relax into the soft mattress. Before I knew it, I was asleep.

The next day, I was up at noon. I felt dizzy and sore, but overall more well rested then I had in a while. I gathered my stuff and took the room key. After I had given the key to the lobbyist, I was out and on my way. I felt lightheaded, and each step took more effort then the last. The lack of food was catching up to me. When was the last time I ate? I knew I had eaten some wild berries the other day. I had felt pretty comfortable after eating that, but I had puked shortly afterwords. My stomach hadn't felt well for the rest of the day, and I spent most of that day resting under a tree. Before that, the last thing I ate was an apple I bought from a small grocery store, and I didn't know when that was.

I let myself fall to sitting on the curb. My head swam; I placed my backpack on the ground next to me and rested my head o it. I closed my eyes as a headache started. Despite having only been awake for a few minutes, I fell asleep.

"Where did you find him again," I heard an unfamiliar voice asked an unseen person.

I was conscious again, but I hadn't opened my eyes. I was warm and comfortable, but my head felt fuzzy. I couldn't focus really well.

"On the street. He was unconscious. He looked like a kid, and I couldn't leave him there. It got too cold last night, he would have died where he was," the unseen person answered the question.

"Well, he's dehydrated and lacking vital nutrients. He probably fainted. I'll assign Dr. Cullen to him," the first person said.

I heard their footsteps as they walked away. My head felt much clearer now, and I was aware of a slight pain in my arm. I opened my eyes, and what I saw surprised me. I was in a hospital. Or, at least I thought I was in a hospital (I had never actually been in a hospital before). I was in a very white, bright room, and there was a beeping sound next to me. When I looked, I saw it was a heart monitor. I looked at my other side (the side the pained arm was on) and saw I was hooked up with some tubes.

_Great, an IV,_ I thought. _Maybe whatever town I'm in, they haven't gotten a police report about my being missing. I just hope that I'm several states away. Then, maybe, that might be true._

I heard footsteps coming closer and I immediately turned my attention to the door. A young doctor with blond hair and golden eyes walked through the door. He looked pleasantly surprised when he saw me staring at him. He had a clipboard in one hand, and a stethoscope around his neck. As he walked, I was amazed at the smoothness of his step. He looked like he was actually forcing his feet to be as loud as they were. Out of everything I saw strange about this doctor, the strangest thing was his skin. It was completely flawless like marble and pale as snow. Not only was his skin flawless, but his features were perfect, too. He was the most handsome man I had ever seen. With the combined grace and the flawless looks, he looked like a god or an angel.

"Hello," he said to me. His voice was just as flawless as his skin and gait.

"Hi," I said, trying to keep suspicion out of my tone. He was a doctor, and an adult with a possibility of knowing that I needed to be sent back to Chicago. From the conversation I had heard a moment ago, I didn't think they knew who I was, but I wasn't letting my guard down.

"I see you're doing better," he said politely.

"Yes, sir," I said. "I feel much better." I did actually. I felt completely rested, and my head wasn't swimming. My mouth wasn't too dry any more either.

"Good, good." He proceeded to look at my heart rate and he checked my IV bag. He wrote something down on his clipboard.

"Now, would you mind telling me your name," he asked when he was done checking my health.

I thought quickly for any name, and ended up saying the first thing that popped into my head. "Robert Mathews," I lied to him. Robert Mathews was my father's boss. I hoped I was far enough away from Chicago that no one would know him.

The doctor nodded. "Alright, Mr. Mathews. Do you mind telling me where you're from." I kept my mouth shut. "Mr. Mathews, we need records for you if you're going to be a patient here."

"I can leave," I said quickly.

The doctor looked amused. "No, Robert, that's fine. I'm going to have to find things out about you another way, then."

"No! I'm from Michigan." I hoped that Michigan wasn't too far from this state.

The doctor looked pleased that I was cooperating. "What city in Michigan?"

"The capital?" It came out more like a question. I mentally kicked myself.

"Pontiac?"

I couldn't remember if that was the actual capital of Michigan. All I could do was nod. I was slightly nervous when the doctor looked smug.

"That wasn't the capital was it?"

"No, it wasn't."

I sighed.

"Mr. Mathews, please tell me where you are from. This is your last chance before I look into it myself."

"Why do you need to know?"

"I need to know who to contact for medical records as well as your health insurance."

"Don't bother." He gave me a questioning look. I figured I might as well tell him since I had already let something out. "I don't have health insurance and I can't remember going to any doctor."

The doctor looked taken aback. "Well that changes things. I suppose I have no reason to know where you came from." He gave me a smile then, it was somewhat reassuring. "I hope you feel better then, Robert."

I just nodded. He left me then, in that room. I decided then and there that I liked Dr. Cullen. He was nice, and I didn't need too much of a story for him. Maybe he could be helpful, too. I yawned widely as whatever meds Dr. Cullen had put into my system kicked in.


	4. Chapter 4

I had been in the hospital for four days. Everyone in the hospital who had anything to do with me thought I was Robert Mathews from Lansing, Michigan. I was supposed to be eighteen, and I was simply struggling with finding work and money. That was how I came to be in the situation they had found me in. Everyone believed this; that is, everyone but Dr. Cullen. When I tried to give him this story, he didn't believe a word of it. He knew for a fact that I was definitely not from Lansing Michigan just because I didn't even know that Lansing was the capital of Michigan. He didn't believe it at all when I told him I was eighteen. I knew I didn't look it, but I hadn't expected his outright denial. So, I made him a deal. I told him that I would tell him the truth about myself if he spread the story I was trying to force on him. He agreed. He even helped me with some parts of my story: he was a natural at making up stories and identities for people. He knew everything about me except that I was running from my parents due to their brutality. I told him that my whole family had died in a fire, and I just wanted away from there.

Today, I was supposed to be allowed to leave the hospital. The doctors had taken my blood sample yesterday, and had deemed me ready to leave. I could have left yesterday, but I had somewhat asked (more of begged really) Dr. Cullen to let me stay another night. I felt so well rested here and I was given platefuls of delicious food. All I had to do was lay there and look somewhat pathetic. Occasionally, a nurse would pass by and see me trying to look as pathetic and broken as possible. The nurses thought I was cute or something because they would always get me some sort of sweet after seeing me laying there brokenly. I absolutely ate up the attention. It was pretty easy to get Carlisle to let me stay. He was definitely a big pushover. As easy as it was to get him to convince the other doctors to let me stay an extra night, he never heard the end of my thanks.

So, it was sadly that I walked out of the hospital doors on the morning of my fourth day being there. It was overcast out, and fairly cold. The sweet scent of rain hung in the air. I groaned. I was to give up being in the warm, comfortable hospital to being out on the cold, wet streets again. I took a step, but didn't even get to put my foot on the ground before someone was calling my name.

"Edward," Dr. Cullen called from just behind me. I had given him my real first name, but he still thought my surname was Mathews.

I turned to face him, slightly hopeful that he would tell me that I could stay at the hospital even longer. "Yes Dr. Cullen," I didn't even try to cover the hope in my voice or face.

"You don't have any where to go, am I correct," he asked.

I was momentarily confused and surprised at the way the conversation was going, but I quickly recovered. "No," I said slowly and suspiciously.

"Would you like to stay at my home. I have an extra room to spare, and I'm sure my family will welcome you warmly." He looked like he was trying to look nice and welcoming, but in his eyes, I saw some sort of anxiousness. Maybe about my answer? I wasn't entirely sure. I studied his face for a minute longer. I don't know what I was looking for, but I guess I didn't actually believe him.

I shrugged. "If your family doesn't mind me irritating them, then I don't see any reason why I couldn't stay there."

Actually, I was completely happy. I had somewhere to go tonight, and maybe even the rest of the week. However, as I thought about it, I realized I couldn't stay with him. If, no, when any news from Chicago reached the news of the good people of Killdeer, North Dakota (I had figured out where I was through the many talks I had with Dr. Cullen) I was dead: literally. I wasn't even sure my parents would keep my alive for slave purposes anymore, not after running away the way I did.

"On secondhand, I don't think I should intrude on your home."

Dr. Cullen looked offended. "You wouldn't be intruding at all, Edward. I insist you stay with my family and I at least for a week. If you have somewhere to be or someone to meet, you could go of course, but I would rather you lived in my home until something comes up. I don't like the idea of you living on the streets."

I sighed. I guess I could stay for just a night or two. "Alright," I said.

Dr. Cullen smiled. "You can stay in my car until my shift is over."

He led me over to his car (a black Mercedes), and started it. I was somewhat touched that he trusted me to sit in his car with it on. If I were him, I would be afraid of me stealing it. However, I couldn't steal his car if I wanted to: I didn't know how to drive. I guess my dad didn't want me running away in his car. He left me there for the whole day. I played with the air conditioner and radio while I waited.

**Carlisle POV**

I walked back into the hospital. Edward seemed happy enough in the car. He was playing with the radio when I left him. I was happy with myself. Edward seemed so young and with nowhere to go, I had to intervene in his little trip to wherever he planned to go. I'd hate to see him dead on the streets.

I walked into my office. There was a small pile of paperwork on my metal desk, but I knew I would get it done quickly. Paperwork was easy to fill out, and didn't take much thought to do. I sat in my chair behind my desk and pulled out my cell phone. I dialed the number that I knew by heart (without having my vampire memory). Esme picked up the phone.

"Anything wrong, honey," she asked.

"No. Quite the opposite actually. Do you remember the boy I told you about the other day?"

"Yes, what about him?"

"I'm bringing him home with me."

"You changed him," she whispered. She was whispering with surprise.

"No, no. That's why I'm calling you, though. I need you to tell the kids a human is coming, and I'd like you to prepare them."

"Of course, honey. I can't wait. I'll tell them right away. I love you."

"I love you, too."

I hung up, and got to work with the papers that had been nagging me the whole time I was in my office.

**Esme POV**

I smiled happily when I got off the phone. I couldn't wait for Edward to come. It might mean a new family member. He would be the youngest if that happened. I'd love to baby him. The other kids were too old to baby, they hated it. Maybe he wouldn't mind.

"Kids," I called. I didn't speak loudly. They would hear me anyways. Sure enough, seconds later, they were all standing before me. Emmet and Jasper were covered in mud and grass, they had to have been wrestling. Alice and Rosalie had makeup only on half their faces.

"Mom, what's up," Emmet asked. The rest of them just stared at me curiously.

"Your father is bringing someone home this -" Emmet cut me off before I got to finish.

"Awesome, someone else to wrestle with. I'm getting sick of beating Jasper all the time."

"You only wish you beat me. You're looking for someone to beat," Jasper said, somewhat tauntingly.

"Boys, I didn't get to finish," I said calmly, trying to get them to calm down, and not start wrestling again. They gave their attention back to me. "Carlisle did not change anyone. He is a mortal." At this, all the kids moaned.

"So you want to bring a mortal to the one place we don't have to hide ourselves," Rosalie asked with a glare and dripping with attitude. "That's great. Perfect. Now we have to worry even in our own home."

"But, mom, why," Jasper asked his expression full of worry. He looked at Alice somewhat pointedly. I knew he was worried that this might bring danger to the family. He didn't want Alice in the middle of it all.

"Guys, it will be great. I've seen it already," Alice said. She looked completely enthusiastic.

"You're visions change, and I don't even think you can see that far ahead," Rosalie sneered.

"I can see far enough," Alice defended herself. "As far as I can see, nothing bad will happen."

"Maybe not today," Rosalie said. "But what about tomorrow or a week from now. You can't watch all our futures all at once all the time. Something will happen eventually."

"Rose," I said calmly. "Sweetie, I know you're worried, but humans have to sleep sometime, and you won't have to hide while he's sleeping. If you really feel you need to let out some frustration or you think you need to be more vampiristic, you can always go outside and hunt."

Rosalie stormed off. Emmet looked at me as if he were apologizing for his wife's behavior, before following her.

I sighed. I looked at the two who remained. "Thank you, Alice for being so optimistic. Jasper, I know you're worried, but your father and I won't let anything happen."

Jasper nodded, and Alice grinned at me before they both left. I smiled to myself, my enthusiasm and joy returning to me at once. "Kids," I called. "I'm going to the grocery store. You all be good. I'll be back soon." I grabbed the keys to the van and headed out to the garage.


	5. Chapter 5

Edward's POV

**I watched as the big, white house became bigger and bigger, as we drove closer and closer. A lot of the house was made up of huge glass windows, and the door was mainly consisting of glass. It was a beautiful house, though. It was three storied, with a beautiful garden, and trees all around it. It was very secluded though. Dr. Cullen drove quite a while before we reached the big house. I couldn't see the city from where we were at all. It was only forest for miles around. I didn't like it. Then again, if I wanted to run off, Dr. Cullen would have a hard time finding me in the forest. **

**As I watched the house grow closer, I thought. How many people lived in this house? I thought that maybe Dr. Cullen would have a wife and kid at home, but seeing his home made me think differently. Why would you need such a big place if you only had a three person family. I started playing with my fingers nervously. This was not a good idea. The more people who lived here, the more of a chance there was for someone to find out about me. The more there would be a chance for people to notice I didn't fit in in social situations. I knew all the manners I needed, but I didn't get to talk to people often. I hoped that there were no teenagers in this house. I wouldn't fit in at all. **

**Dr. Cullen opened the garage and we drove in. After he had gotten out of the car, I cautiously followed. I stared at the large garage. I had never imagined a garage this big before, and the whole thing was full of cars. I looked at it with wide eyes. There was a pink car, a red car, a huge yellow jeep, and a van at the end. I looked in disbelief. Was Dr. Cullen really this rich?**

"**Nice cars," I said. **

"**Thank you," Dr. Cullen said. He started heading for the door. I just watched somewhat dumbly. He opened the door and looked back to make sure I had followed. "Edward, you don't have to stay in the garage."**

**I nodded and followed him into the house. It was big, open, and bright inside. The living room was perfectly decorated with color here and there, so that it wasn't so white it was unpleasant. It looked comfortable. It must have been because there was someone on the couch. He was a large, muscled guy who definitely didn't look like a child. Dr. Cullen must rent the rooms in his large house. **

"**Cool, you're home," the guy on the couch said. He came over to us, and I found myself cringing away from him. He was very muscular and, for some reason, menacing looking. He looked a lot like Dr. Cullen. His skin was very pale, and he had the same gold eyes, except a bit lighter. His hair was dark, though, and curly. "Mom's at the store, by the way."**

**I stared curiously at him. Surely, Dr. Cullen wasn't this guy's biological father. I looked at him, as if making sure my eyes hadn't tricked me about his age before. Yep, he was still young looking. Maybe this guy was adopted?**

**The big guy turned to me then. "You must be Edward," he said and before I answered, "I'm Emmet." He gave a hand out to me for a handshake. Instinctively, I cringed away. He gave me a strange look and pulled his hand back. "Okay, then," Emmet said. He turned and plopped back down on the couch. **

"**Edward, do you want me to give you a tour, or do you think you can manage," Dr. Cullen asked me. **

"**I can manage," I said.**

**Dr. Cullen smiled at me. "Alright, Edward. I'll be upstairs in my study if you need me."**

**He left then. I looked around the living room cautiously. I saw a door going somewhere else, and I immediately started walking towards it. I just wanted to be out of this room with the big guy cheering and jeering at the television.**

**The following room was the kitchen and dining room combined. Like the living room, it was very spacious, and had a view of the forest. It was also light in here, but was more colored than white unlike the last room. It gave off a natural woodsy feel. **

**I heard something clatter and move, and jumped startled. I turned to the source of the noise, and saw a woman I hadn't noticed in the corner. It looked like she had been huddled over a bowl of something, and her back must have been facing me. I concluded this as the reason I had not seen her. Right now though, she was facing me completely. She was a beautiful woman and - just like the other two people in the house I had seen - had snow white skin and gold eyes. Her hair was caramel colored, and bouncy looking. She was slender, and inhumanly graceful (even just standing still).**

"**Hello, Edward," she said. "I'm Esme, but you can call me Mrs. C or Mrs. Cullen. I'm not too picky."**

"**Hi," I said. She wasn't as intimidating as the big, curly haired guy or even Dr. Cullen. I opened my mouth to ask how everyone already seemed to know me when a tall, blond walked into the room. She was raised even higher above the ground by really high heels. She had the same eyes and skin as everyone else (I was beginning to wonder if they weren't all biologically related after all). **

**The blond girl turned to me to glare quickly, but she whipped her head around speedily to face Esme. "Esme, do you know if Alice stole my make up bag?"**

"**No, dear, I don't. Why didn't you ask Alice," she asked.**

"**She's out with Jasper," the blond said curtly.**

"**You might want to check her room then, Rosalie." **

**Rosalie turned on her heel with an irritated expression and stormed out of the room.**

**I followed swiftly, when I saw Esme turn back to her bowl. I was back in the living room where Emmet and Rosalie were on the couch snuggling. I turned my head and started for the stairs. The room that headed off of the stairs was a lodge. It was very colorful in here. Whoever had decorated it had tried to make it seem fun and vibrant; it was, but it was also overwhelming.**

"**Yes," I heard someone exclaim. I turned to see a honey blond boy sitting on a bean bag with a weirdly shaped device in his hand. It had a cord running to yet another box-like device.**

**Abruptly, the images that had been moving on the screen stopped. I could feel someone staring at me. Nervously, I looked at the guy in the bean bag; he was glaring at me. His eyes were dark, and he seemed to give off a dangerous vibe. I had thought him far less dangerous then Emmet just a moment ago, but now I was unsure.**

"**Boo!"**

**I jumped and yelped when someone grabbed me suddenly from behind. I turned and saw a short, pixie-like girl grinning at me. She had dark hair and - yet again - pale skin and yellow eyes.**

"**I'm Alice," the brunette chirped. "And you're Edward." How did everyone here know my name? "I see you've already met Jasper." She gestured to bean bag boy. I just nodded dumbly. **

**Bean bag boy, or Jasper, stood up with a huff, and left the room.**

"**Don't mind him," Alice said. She said the next part louder for Jasper to hear, and turned in the way Jasper just left. "He's a big fat jerk!" **

**She grabbed my hand and pulled me along to the large armoire. She shoved me to sit on the ground in front of it. She danced to a shelf and pulled out a disk. She put it into the weird box-like device, and handed me the weird device Jasper had just held. I could see now it had buttons on it.**

"**Play with me," she demanded.**

**After Alice guided me through what she called a video game, I put the controller in front of the "game cube". **

"**Rose wants to go shopping," Alice squealed. She got up quickly and left. She left so quickly I didn't even have time to comprehend she was gone. **

**Jasper came back into the room and glared at me. "Get out," he snarled. I jumped, and ran out of the room. I stood in an unknown room shaking for a moment. Jasper had actually sounded like an animal just then. I shivered with fear.**


	6. Chapter 6

**Jasper's POV**

It was night time. Everyone was happy, 'cause the mortal was asleep. Rosalie was doing everything quickly and with all her strength just to show how unhappy she had been all day, and Emmet was in the yard working out by punching trees in half. He didn't have to work out, 'cause vampires didn't get any stronger, but Emmet seemed to feel the need anyways.

I looked around for my wife. I hadn't seen her since the mortal fell asleep. I got up off the couch and walked around lookin' for Alice. I could have just stayed and listened for her, but I didn't want to be in the living room with Rosalie anymore. Her emotions were getting to me. She was irritated over something. Who knew when it came to Rosalie?

I passed by the human's room then. I hadn't realized I had shambled my way up the stairs. He was asleep as far as I could tell. His even breathing was what gave him away. I couldn't understand why everyone was letting him stay here when he was so obviously a danger. What if the Volturi found out? I had seen the Volturi in action before. All I could say was that everyone better hope they would show us mercy.

I remained in front of the human's bedroom door, thinking of a way to get him out. Maybe I could send fearful emotions to provoke a nightmare. I listened to everyone to make sure no one was around. Emmet was still outside, Alice wasn't around, and Esme and Carlisle still seemed to be hunting. I opened the bedroom door a crack and began sending off the emotion.

**Edward's POV**

I had fallen asleep in the guest room that Mrs. Cullen had shown me to earlier today. For once, I was actually getting a restful sleep. It was late at night when I started having nightmares. They were worse than usual. The first one was simply of Jasper and Emmet. They were red eyed and advancing towards me. I could tell their purpose was to hurt me, but I wasn't sure how. I began to run. The dream switched here. It faded into a new dream.

_I was sitting in the living room with Dr. Cullen and his whole family all around me. We were all smiling at each other, but everything had that dark edge to it that most of my nightmares had. It began to rain and storm outside, and in the instant that I looked. Most of the Cullens had disappeared. I could only watch in horror as each of the rest seemed to blow away into shadows. Dr. Cullen went just after my parents burst through the door. They each had their usual choice of weapon (my mom: a knife, my dad: his fists) along with a small hand gun. My dad pushed me to the ground, and my mom cut my mouth along the corner._

"_Where's your family, now," my dad asked menacingly, as he pulled the trigger on the gun._

I woke with a gasp and a shout. I was sweaty and shaky. I looked around the room in paranoia, but didn't see anything until I looked at the door. The door was open a crack, and in the light that flooded in, I could see a shadow standing there.

"Hello," I said. My voice was shaky. The shadow just slipped away.

Nervously, I walked over to my door, and reached out a shaking hand to open it, but someone on the other side opened it before me. I fell backward onto the floor.

"Edward," Carlisle asked worriedly. He quickly found me on the floor and reached out a hand for me. I took it and pulled myself up. "Are you alright," he asked concernedly.

"Yes." I looked behind him to see if the shadow was still there; it wasn't. "It was just a nightmare is all."

"Alright, Edward. Go back to sleep then, I'm sorry for disturbing you." And he left.

I curled back up in bed, cursing the cold. It was freezing in this house. For the first time, I noticed my breath was visible. It took me a while in the temperature, but I eventually fell back asleep.

The next day I found most of the kids of the house playing video games. Jasper and Rosalie were the only ones missing. I watched them for a few moments before sneaking down to the kitchen. Esme was here still in her pajamas making pancakes.

"I'm sorry, Edward. Everyone else ate their pancakes and yours as well. Wait a moment and I can get you some," she said kindly.

I smiled. "Thank you."

I made my way to the living room and sat down on the couch. I heard a thump upstairs, and looked at the ceiling just in time to see too figures barreling through in a fistfight, plaster and wood flying everywhere. When they landed, I was able to see that it was Emmet and Jasper and they were still fighting as if they hadn't just fell through the floor. At some points, I couldn't even see them: they were just blurs of speed.

"Boys," Carlisle rushed into the room in a blur just as fast as the two boys he was yelling at. Immediately, the two stopped in their positions and hurried to stand before their 'father'. "What is the meaning of this? You two never fight, not seriously anyways, and you never fight in the house."

"He started it," Jasper muttered looking at the floor.

"Nu, uh! You did," Emmet shouted.

"I don't care who started it; I just want to know why," Carlisle said rubbing his brow line.

The two broke out in shouts and arguments then, that I couldn't keep up with. Carlisle seemed able to, though, because afterwards he said, "So this was all just because you thought the other had cheated on a game: a video game?"

The two nodded ashamedly.

Carlisle sighed. "You two are so lucky Edward didn't see any of this. Do you know what this would mean for us and him?"

"It's too late, dear." My head whipped around at the new voice. It was Esme, coming out of the kitchen, holding the pancakes on a plate. She was looking at me. "He's already seen."

Carlisle turned to me. "Oh, dear," he said quietly. "This is not good."

I sat at the dining room table nervously. The Cullens sat around me looking more anxious than me. Jasper was glaring at me, and I naturally averted his gaze. Carlisle looked worried, Esme looked concerned, Emmet and Rosalie looked angry and scared, and Alice looked fine.

Carlisle gave Emmet and Jasper an irritated look before turning to me nervously again. "Edward, I don't know what you think about what just happened, but the family and I have decided to tell you the truth."

"I don't want to know," I said quickly. "Just let me leave, and you'll never have to worry about me again." Somehow I knew that whatever he was about to tell me would change my life forever. Whatever he told me would make me unable to leave. I could see it on his face.

"Edward, you cannot leave now. Even if you swore to me that you would never tell anyone about what you just saw, you would not be able to leave." He sighed. "Edward, we are vampires." Everyone in the room tensed and looked at me.

"What," I exclaimed. I laughed nervously. "That's funny. I don't hear that one everyday."

They all looked at me seriously (except jasper, who was still glaring at me intensely).

"Can I eat him," Jasper asked. He was serious about it, I could tell. He was looking at me hungrily now.

I jumped from my seat and darted to the wall - as far away from him as I could get.

Carlisle stood up angrily and quickly with a slight snarl. "No one's eating anyone," he shouted. He looked ready to attack Jasper.

"Jasper," Alice said warning. "You need to go outside. I'll follow in a minute."

Jasper gave me another angry look, glanced warily at Carlisle, and left.

Alice turned to me (still against the wall and breathing hard with my heart pounding in my ears), smiled, and asked, "Do you still want your pancakes?"


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7**

I avoided all of them after that. My room remained locked even though I was sure that they could easily break it down, and judging by the way they easily broke through the floor, I knew it was true. I stayed in my room for a full week. Three times a day, someone knocked on my door and brought me food. I didn't trust them making my meals anymore than I trusted them around my neck, but on the second day, the smell of smoked turkey right outside drew me out. I quickly took it and the water and locked myself away again. I stopped starving myself after that.

When I had been in my room for a week, there was a knock on my door at an unusual time. I ignored it.

"Edward?" It was Esme. "Do you want to talk?"

I ignored her.

She let the silence go on a full five minutes. "No one is here right now if you do not wish the others to hear. I'm sorry that you do not feel comfortable. I… I truly won't hurt you." She sounded upset.

I sighed and hopped off my bed. Slowly, I unlocked the door and pulled it open. Esme stood there looking as graceful as I remembered. Her expression showed her relief at me answering to her.

"May I come in," she asked. "Or would you prefer to move elsewhere?"

"In here's fine," I muttered sulking back to my bed.

Esme followed me in, and seated herself on the chair in the corner. She smiled at me without showing her teeth. Maybe she was being extra careful not to show her fangs.

"Edward, we've all been worried about you," she started. "I know this must be overwhelming to you and frightening, but I promise no one in this house will harm you."

She looked like she truly felt sorry for me and concerned, but I pushed that away. Who knew what sort of tricks she was playing on me. I kept my eyes in a glare and my lips shut.

"Edward, can you please talk to me, so I know how you feel?"

I wanted to trust her then. I did not know if she put it into my head or not, but I honestly wanted to trust her. Her eyes showed her hurt that I could only guess was because I didn't trust her. She seemed like she truly cared about my feelings. That was something that my own mother had never done. It was slightly funny that a vampire would care about me more than my own parents.

"I…I'm scared." I finally gave her some feedback She looked relieved and upset at the same time.

"I know you are. It's not…normal for anyone to meet a family of… well, like us." She looked like she wanted nothing more than to come over and comfort me. "Do you have any questions that might make you feel better if they were answered?"

I thought a moment before my brain came over something that greatly bothered me. I looked her straight in the eye so that I would know if she were lying or not. "How many people have you killed?"

She seemed slightly amused. "Edward, we don't drink the blood of humans." That took me aback. "We drink animal blood. I can not believe none of us thought to tell you that. How fearful you must have been. No wonder you have locked yourself in your room this whole time."

"How do I know you're not lying," I accused.

She got up and walked to the door. "If you come with me, I can show you."

I deliberated for a moment. However, I ended up getting up and following her out of the room. She led me into a study upstairs next to her own bedroom. It was a wooded room filled with pictures. Carlisle was in quite a few, and some had Esme while others had Jasper, Alice, Emmet, or Rosalie, and others had them all. There were other pictures, though, that had people I did not know. Their pictures made me recoil.

"What do you want to show me in here," I asked frustrated.

Esme went to one of the pictures with the strangers in it. I noticed Carlisle was in it as well then. It made the picture less menacing.

_I'm a wuss, _I thought. _What idiot is afraid of a picture? Me apparently. Maybe I should just be killed off. If I was an animal I would have been at birth._ I was more bitter than usual, I realized. However, that realization quickly passed.

"These people," Esme started. "Do you see their eyes?"

Despite my instincts telling me not to, I stepped closer. Carlisle's eyes were the honey gold they always were, but the vampires around him… I shuddered.

"They're scarlet," I said.

Esme nodded.

"But what does that have to do with anything," I asked confused. So what, people have different eye colors. It did not make it weird. The only thing strange was that they had red eyes.

"It's the reason their eyes are scarlet. Their eyes differ from mine and the rest of us Cullens because of their diet. They -"

"But don't all vampires have the same… diet?" This was interesting.

Esme smiled softly. "We all drink blood, but there are kinder paths to take. Carlisle found this out shortly after he was changed. We can live off of animal blood. It's a gentler diet that takes a lot of dedication, but it allows us to interact with people like we want to. It allows us to act like people." She sighed. "These people in the picture, though. They don't… live as gently."

I could see the point of the lesson. "So vampires who drink… hu… human blood have red eyes, but vampires who drink animal blood have gold eyes?"

Esme nodded.

Although, I wanted to deny it, I accepted the information. Maybe just because it was coming from Esme. I was not sure. She seemed like a kind enough person to deny that sort of craving though, and Carlisle was a doctor. Maybe she was telling the truth.

"Does that make you feel better," Esme asked.

"Yes."

"Do you want to come downstairs and help me make cookies," she asked.

I smiled. I felt ridiculous for ever thinking Esme or Carlisle would try to kill any human. What had I been thinking? They were kinder and more trusting then my own parents. I should have just accepted them. I silently thanked whatever angel had led me to these people. True, they were vampires, but they were the kindest vampires I could have possibly met.

"Yes, I'll help make cookies," I said.

Esme and I went downstairs. I felt happy and light, now. For one, I would never have to go back to my parents, for this family of vampires was too afraid I would tell their secret for me to leave. For another, I was finally with a family that liked me. I was finally somewhere where I felt loved.

However, all happiness left me when we took the last step down the stairs. Carlisle sat in a chair in the living room surrounded by a group of people. They all sat on the sofas around Carlisle, but they all stared at me. I froze in my fear as their deep, scarlet eyes bore into me.

"Esme, dear, we need to talk," Carlisle said.


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8**

Carlisle got up and walked towards Esme and I. He turned to his guests and said, "If you'll give us the moment alone, please?" One of the vampires nodded, and Carlisle pushed me and Esme out of the room. The three of us ended up in the kitchen.

Carlisle looked warily at us two. "Esme, we have some complications."

"I saw that," Esme said. "How did this happen?"

"Aro decided to pay us a visit," Carlisle said. He looked worn and nervous.

"What's the problem, then," I asked. It was slightly scaring me that they were nervous. Vampires did not need to be nervous. They were fearless.

"The people in the picture I just showed you," Esme started.

"The vampires who… don't drink animal blood," I asked.

"The Volturi," Carlisle said.

"What," I asked. These vampires were going to give me a headache. Remembering they were vampires, I suddenly felt conscious, and backed away from them.

"The Volturi are -," Carlisle started to explain.

"Should we really tell him," Esme asked. She was looking at me with a sad, worried expression. It was very much motherly, and I felt a little warmer towards her.

"He already knows what we are. I don't see how the predicament could be any worse," Carlisle said. He turned back to me then. "The Volturi are a powerful vampire family, who are very similar to royalty. They upkeep vampire law. That is, they make sure vampires are kept a secret from human radar."

I smiled nervously. "Well, they've done a bad job," I joked halfheartedly.

"Edward, you have to understand," Esme pleaded.

I looked slightly confused. It was obvious to me. What else did I have to comprehend? These… vampires were going to kill me. I knew their secret, I was a weakness, and needed to be eliminated.

"I know," I said. "They have to kill me. Let's get it over with." I started to walk back to the evil vampires, trying not to let my fear and panic overtake me. However, my heart was sure to give me away as it was beating quite loud.

Carlisle grabbed my shoulder as I passed him. "Edward, we will not let them kill you. I brought you here, knowing the risks, and I will set this right." He looked tired then. He sighed deeply, and steered me into the living room.

Even though, Carlisle was slightly standing in front of me, and Esme stood next to me (she was holding my hand much to my embarrassment), I felt naked and completely exposed in front of the searching gaze of the red eyed vampires seated on the couch.

"Carlisle," Aro said, thoughtfully. "I am curious as to why you did this?" He got up from his seat and stepped towards our little trio. I tried my hardest not to flinch away from him, but I felt my body tense and move slightly away from him. Aro reached for Carlisle's hand. "May I?"

"Of course," Carlisle said, stretching his arm out to him.

I watched, kind of weirded out, as Aro took Carlisle's hand in his own. I looked at Esme questioningly, but she had eyes only for the two men holding hands. She looked like she was worried and anxious.

Aro looked greatly satisfied. He closed his eyes for a moment, and breathed out in satisfaction. "Ahh," he said in acknowledgement.

It was not too long before Aro let go of Carlisle's hand and opened his eyes again. He turned those red, soulless holes to look at me. I tensed, but refused to move like my instincts were telling me to.

"May I examine him," Aro asked Carlisle.

Carlisle looked warily at me, and then at Esme when she moved a little more in front of me. She seemed like she was seriously protecting me from Aro.

"Aro, wouldn't it be a lot more polite to ask him rather than Carlisle," Esme asked bordering on impoliteness.

"Ah… yes… my mistake," Aro said. He looked at me with those scary, red eyes with a curious look to him. He stepped closer to me a few steps and stopped there.

Carlisle walked to Esme and I, and put an arm around Esme's waist. He pulled her away from me. However, the two were not too far away. They were obviously worried something would happen to me.

"Edward," he held out his hand, looking at my own. I looked at Carlisle, my eyes wide with slight fear and apprehension. Carlisle nodded encouragingly. I turned to Aro then, and nodded, giving him my shaking hand.

Aro took it, and I immediately was taken back to my oldest memory.

It was a surprisingly fond memory, and I wanted to linger on it more than whatever strange force let me. It was a happier time in my life when I had had fun being around my parents, and we were a family. We were at an aquarium, and acting like any normal family would. My dad had me up on his shoulders, and was trying to point out a great white shark swimming menacingly across the floor of its tank. I was laughing and giggling, pretending like I did not see it. My dad and mom were smiling, and laughing with me.

The memory changed, though, and it went to my next memory of those younger years of mine. However, this memory was not near as happy.

I came home from school that day very much pleased with myself. I was only seven, but I new that getting straight As was something to be proud of. Tommy Greenhorn said that you get ice cream and toys when that happened, and I knew my mom was going to be so happy. I had skipped all the way home. However, when I entered the house, my dad stood over my mom his fists raised and his voice at a scream. I paused in the doorway taking in the scene. However, my dad had to have heard the door open for he turned around with an evil look in his eyes. He rounded on me yelling at me about something about work and not doing well because of me. I started crying. That was when he threw a punch to my stomach, yelling at me not to cry.

After that, my memories only got worse and worse. They became darker and more full of pain. I could feel myself flinching unwillingly, and could faintly hear Carlisle and Esme talking. Eventually, the I came upon one particularly horrible memory, and I started sobbing. My body shook with it, and I just cried.

"What's he doing to him," I heard Esme cry frantically.

"He's not being injured Esme," Carlisle soothed her. Then more urgently, "What's happening, Aro?"

I did not hear the response, and I was surprised I heard any of the rest over my own sobs. The memories just kept coming, and they were only getting more and more terrible. Finally, the last memory came up. It was the last time I saw my dad, the morning of the day I ran away. He had punched me awake. The next memories flew by in short flashes.

Aro let go of my hand, and I was pulled back to the present a little too abruptly. I fell to the floor, trying to control myself. I was gasping for air like a drowning man, but it seemed like I was not getting any oxygen. Tears continued to stream down my face.

Suddenly, I was in someone's arms. They were cool and hard, but the most comforting things I had ever felt. I knew it was Esme. She had me in an embrace so that one arm went around my back and the other ran across my chest under my arms. I squeezed tightly to the arm in front of me as if it were a life preserver. My head was against her shoulder, and my eyes were closed tight. I did not stop myself from crying, this had been coming for a while, I knew. It would have been futile to try to stop.

"What happened," Carlisle asked.

"He could not handle his own memories," Aro said quietly.

I did not hear anything from them after that. I assumed they stopped talking, but they might have continued in whispers.

The silence went on for what seemed like hours. I continued crying.

"Carlisle," Esme said softly, eventually. "I'm going to take him upstairs. If you need me, you know where I'll be."

Carlisle must have nodded his approval, for Esme helped me up. All her movements were slow, and gentle. Her voice matched her movement.

She led me up the stairs, keeping a hand in the small of my back. It was strangely comforting. I stifled my sobs, sure they would throw off my balance. However, they were on the edge, hardly contained.

Eventually, we made it to my room. I sat on the edge of my bed. I did not feel like crying any more, and now that I had contained my tears, I could stop it completely. However, my eyes still stung with the saltiness of tears.

Esme gave me a few moments to collect myself before asking the obvious question to ask. "Edward, sweetie, what happened?"

I looked down to my hands, placed in my lap. I was not quite sure how to answer this question. I had to be careful. She had just thrown a shark into the water. "I… Let's just say my past has been kind of rocky." I hoped this did not bring up another question, the one I did not know the answer to. Why did I start thinking of my life? My whole life had flashed before my eyes. Why?

"Esme," I started. "Why… what did Aro want my hand for?"

"Oh," Esme said. "Aro can see every thought you ever had through a touch."

"What," I exclaimed. The answer to my question was in my grasp.

"Yes, certain vampires have powers beyond the norm. Alice can see the future," she said matter-of-factly.

I nodded, slowly.

"Edward," Esme said after a moment's silence. I looked at her. I saw her eyes shimmer with some emotion for a moment. It looked almost like her heart was breaking through her eyes. "If you don't mind…" This was not going to be good. "…What hurt you so bad?"

"I don't want to talk about," I said. I was not sure if I did not want to talk to her about it because I was uncomfortable, or if it was because I was still afraid of my parents. I hoped it was the former.

"Okay," was all Esme said.

She might have said something else, but I was not paying enough attention. I could not hide from my parents forever, always living in their shadow. Except, in my case, their shadow was a very dark, and deep thing that would hide me from the rest of the world forever. Could I live like that for the rest of my life, always afraid? No. I had to tell someone. I looked at Esme then. Why not tell her? She was a vampire, nothing could ever hurt her for knowing. Nothing could hurt me while I was here, with people who liked me.

"Esme," I said, slightly apprehensive of what I was about to do. "I changed my mind. I want to talk about it," I said. I proceeded to tell her everything. Now that it was fresh in my head, I did not have to pause for thought at any part of my story. A few times, however, I had to pause to control my emotional levels. Esme looked like she wanted to hug me at these times, but I did not let her. I continued talking before she acted on these motives.

When I was through, fresh tears ran down my cheeks, and I was back to looking at the hands in my lap.

"Oh Edward," Esme said. She took me in an embrace. I broke down… again. Esme let me cry on her, and all the while she hummed soothingly in my ear.

When I was calm again, I did not move away. I had my eyes closed already, and I just left them that way. Esme was still humming very slightly, and she was swaying a very little. I was under the impression she thought I was asleep. This was partly true. I was very near to being so.

Suddenly, the door opened, but I did not bother to see who it was. Esme did not waver once so I knew it could not be anyone I should worry about.

"Is he asleep," I heard Carlisle ask softly.

"Yes," she said.

"I need to talk to you," Carlisle whispered.

"I don't want to wake him."

"You won't." There was a pause, and I was aware of Carlisle moving closer to us. "Here, I'll take him." He picked me up then, and still I kept my eyes closed. "Pull back the blankets. I heard linen being moved. I was laid on the bed gently, and one of them pulled the covers over me.

It was seconds before I heard the door close to my bedroom, and I was left in quiet.


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter 9**

_Esme POV_

I followed Carlisle out of Edward's room. Before I left, I gave the boy one last look. He looked so peaceful now that he was asleep. This was in contrast to the broken hearted look he had had on his face while he had told me his life's story. I wanted to break down with him, the pain was so prominent on his face. Who could do such a thing to such a sweet boy? I wanted to kill whoever it was. Truly, for the first time in my life, I wanted to hurt a human.

Eventually, Carlisle and I were in our bedroom. He took a seat on the loveseat in the corner of our room, and I sat down next to him. He looked horribly pained. I leaned against him, and wrapped my arms around him. He hugged me back, leaning into the embrace as well. I angled my head up and gave him a soft kiss.

"What happened after I left," I asked softly. It could not have been anything good, and I was a little upset I had not been down there to support him. However, Edward had needed me more at the time.

"We should not have had Edward come here," Carlisle said. "I made a mistake, and now it's too late."

"It was not your fault. You did not know," I said.

Carlisle sighed and got up. He started to pace the diameter of our bedroom. His hands were behind his back.

"I did know, though. I knew it was dangerous if he came here, and I ignored it, and now an innocent boy has a horrible fait."

"What did Aro say," I asked quietly, dreading the answer.

"We only have two options." Carlisle came and sat next to me. "We have to change him or kill him."

_Edward POV_

It was dark when I woke. The light of the moon cast shadows around the room, and I had a very eerie feeling. It seemed like something was not right in my world. Of course, I could not think of a time when everything was right in my fragile existence.

Shaking off the feeling, I got out of bed, and headed for the door. Outside of my room, the house was lit up. I could see the Cullens from here as my room was right by the landing. Rosalie and Emmet were on the couch, watching some movie. Alice was seated with Jasper on the loveseat prattling on about something.

I did not see Carlisle or Esme down there, however.

Quietly, I started to walk downstairs. I did not want to draw attention to myself. Alice had not seen me in a week, and I did not want to put up with her at the moment. I also did not feel like being the subject of Rosalie and Jasper's glares. However, I must have failed miserably at silence for I was on the second to the top step when all got quiet and they were all looking at me.

"Edward," Alice squealed. She was on the top step in a second flat. She still was not taller than me. She gave me a gentle hug, and I merely tensed in response.

Suddenly, Carlisle and Esme came into the room.

"Edward," Carlisle said pleasantly. "You're awake."

I nodded. Alice ran down the stairs back to Jasper. I blinked once, and she was down there. It was very overwhelming.

"Come on down here, Edward," Carlisle said. "We all need to talk."

Warily, I walked down the stairs. I was contemplating on whether or not to sit on one of the couches, but two vampire couples rested on both, so I decided to stand at the bottom of the steps.

Carlisle and Esme entered the room a little more so that they were next to the large couch.

"That's horrible," Alice suddenly said. She looked at me in horror.

I looked around me as if I expected she was looking at someone else.

"Can you shut up so she can tell us already," Rosalie snapped.

"Rosalie," Esme scolded.

Rosalie rolled her eyes. "Just tell us what bad news you have now."

Carlisle finally was able to speak. "As you all know, the Volturi came today. Of course, they saw Edward. Naturally, they had to know what was going on here, and Aro now knows everything."

"I told you this was a bad idea," Rosalie muttered.

Jasper stood up then. His eyes were wider than they normally were, and he looked very much afraid. When he shot a look back at Alice on the loveseat, I knew he was worried about her.

"Carlisle, they're going to kill us," Jasper asked. It sounded like a question and a statement.

"Unless we do something about Edward," Carlisle said.

All the vampires gave me a look at the same time. I gulped, and took a step back. What did that mean? I saw Jasper staring at my throat, and Rosalie had the smallest smile on her lips. It was a very evil thing, and I found I backed up one step. I backed all the way into the wall when she stood up.

"Rose," that was Emmet's deep voice, warningly.

"Let's do it then," Rosalie said. She took a few steps closer to me. Having nowhere to go, I simply put my shaky hands up in a very weak defense attempt. "It will be easy. You guys don't even have to watch if you don't want to."

Suddenly, Esme was in front of me. "Rosalie, sit back down right now. We are not killing him."

Rosalie's eyes gleamed, but she did as she was told. Emmet took her hand in a locked grip, obviously not wanting her to get up again.

"Rose, it will turn out alright," Alice said. She stood up so that she was next to Jasper now.

"How can you be so sure," Jasper asked her, taking one of her hands.

"Trust me, General Whitlock," she said. She kissed him on the cheek.

Carlisle moved across to stand next to Esme. I felt like I was in a bomb shelter, and they were the walls around me. Rosalie was the bomb.

"Children," Carlisle said. They all immediately gave him their attention. "Aro has given us two choices. If we do not pick one, they have threatened to destroy us." He took a deep breath. "Aro has told us we can either kill Edward or change him." At this, Carlisle moved aside so that I was again in sight of the rest of the family. "Edward, this decision is entirely up to you," he said. "If you do not wish for either, we will defend you as best we can."

"Who said," Rosalie asked. "I don't want to. We all know Jasper does not want to either. Who will help you, Carlisle?"

"Rosalie, I understand if you do not wish to help us. However, if you do leave, you have to understand it will be difficult to allow you back into our coven."

Rosalie huffed.

"And as for Jasper, I have not heard anything from him." He looked at Jasper.

"Carlisle," Jasper started. "You know I only worry about Alice, but does it seem right to you to ask me to fight for something I did not support in the first place?"

I could tell that stung Carlisle. I knew he thought of everyone of them as his children, and I knew he had been hoping they would support him as he would probably support them. They proved him wrong, and it was all my fault. If Carlisle had to choose between me and his family (I of all people knew that family was a treasure that some people never get) I could never forgive myself.

I cleared my throat to get the vampires' attention. Most of them turned to look at me. Rosalie looked away in a very petulant action.

"By change, you mean -" I was cut off by Alice.

"Turn you into a vampire," she chirped excitedly. I remembered that she could see the future. Hadn't Esme just told me that? If that was true, she probably had seen the outcome of this already.

"I'll do it," I said.

Alice smiled and squealed. She was obviously happy about this. The others all looked unsure.

"Are you sure, Edward," Esme asked me. "That's a lot of experiences to give up, and you don't even know what you're going to miss."

"He would not be able to do those things dead, either," Emmet said. He had a smile on his face now as well. Despite myself, I shied away from his friendly look. "Alright little bro, welcome to the family," Emmet boomed happily.

Rosalie got up and left the room. Jasper nodded his approval, and Alice was still jumping up and down excitedly.

Carlisle nodded somewhat thoughtfully at me, and said, "If you're sure Edward, follow me."

I followed him up the stairs.


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter 10**

I followed Carlisle up the stairs, and into my bedroom. I stood there kind of awkwardly, not really sure how this went. Obviously, I had never been turned into a vampire before.

"Edward, why don't you sit on your bed," he said. He seemed more nervous than even I.

I gulped, and sat down nervously. I could feel my body shaking. I hoped this would not hurt, but who knew.

"Will this hurt," I asked, my voice just as shaky as my body.

He sighed. He looked old then. "I'm afraid so. I am going to have to be truthful. This will hurt worse than if I had set you on fire. Are you sure you want to go through with this?"

I nodded. However, I was more nervous now. I just hoped the pain would not last long. Really unsure what I should be doing to help, I fidgeted uncomfortably.

Carlisle remained standing a good two yards away. He did not seem to want to come closer. I wondered if he changed people into vampires with his mind. Finally, he sighed, and looked down.

"I can't do this right now, Edward. Give me a moment, and I will be back soon."

All I could do was nod. I sighed, finally grasping how much I had been dreading and anticipating the pain he had described to me. The sad part was, he had not gone into much detail with it. However, I did not have much time to relax, for Carlisle was back with Esme moments later.

"Edward, I'm only asking you one more time. Are you sure," Carlisle asked me again.

"Yes," I said. This time more confident.

He gave a look to Esme that seemed almost like a reminder. He turned back to me. He gave another soft sigh, and took my arm. I recoiled at his touch, but did not move an inch. He seemed to have noticed, for he paused again.

"It might be better if you close your eyes," he said.

I nodded, unable to speak. My eyes closed tight. I definitely did not want to see whatever he was about to do.

Suddenly, I felt pain in the arm Carlisle was holding. It was just like a slice of a knife, and just as quick. However, it covered both the top and the bottom of my arm. Then, the thing that had cut me was away from my arm. I opened my eyes out of curiosity. I had a bite mark in my arm just above the wrist. It was bleeding. I had just enough time to examine the wound for a brief second and look to Carlisle questioningly, when the fire started.

I did not know what had hit me. The flames seemed to have erupted from my strange wound, though. My eyes squeezed tightly shut as the fire - no, it was worse than fire, like the doctor had said - started eating away at my insides. I had to have already been a horrible mess of burned flesh, even though the strange fire was still traveling up my arm.

I could not describe this fire as anything but the flames of Hades. Although it did feel like flames, it hurt worse than that. I knew how it felt to get burned (my dad had shoved me in our fireplace when I was 15), and this was so much worse. I felt like the very core of evil had decided to punish me. I could not help but wonder what I had done to deserve this.

_Make it stop_, I wanted to yell.

I wanted to scream so that everyone on Earth knew I was being tortured so badly. Maybe someone would hear me then. It was only when the flames had spread through nearly half my body when I realized I was screaming. Who knew how long I had been yelling? Why was not anyone helping me? Was it not obvious I was hurting? Surely I was loud enough. The Cullens were vampires, if they could not hear this no one would.

_Help me, _I screamed. Although, I did not know if this was audible or not.

The pain continued. I did not know for how long it stayed in me eating at my insides, but it stayed for a long time. It did not want to stay in one spot either. Sure, I could feel it everywhere, but it would intensify in certain areas. First, it was at the edge of my finger, and slowly worked itself up to my wrists. Then, it was burning horribly in my abdomen. It stayed there for a long time. After that, it was in my feet, working up to my ankles. The worst was when it was in my head. This felt like my brain was fueling it. It was killing me, I knew it was. However, this did not last forever either. It moved again to my abdomen. It now felt like a living thing, trying to find the worst areas to torture me, and it had settled on my brain and my stomach.

The pain never did dull, but I began to hear a voice. It was fuzzy and hard to hear at first, but it told me there was something outside of this insane fire. Very slowly, I was able to figure out the voice belonged to Carlisle.

"Edward, son. I hope you're okay. I know it hurts, but your be okay. We've all gone through this, it ends, I promise."

"How is he," that was Esme's voice.

"You remember this pain," Carlisle said grimly. Then he said a little more lightly, "His screams are not as intense or loud, and his pleas come less often."

I heard myself then. It was strange, for I was not actually making myself talk (that I knew of anyways). Of course, I had not been making myself talk through this whole time, but apparently I had been.

"Make it stop," I moaned.

"It will, son," Carlisle answered.

Faintly, I felt someone grab my hand, but I did not know which one of them did.

"Rosalie is throwing a fit," Esme said quietly. "I hope she will accept him."

"Yes, they will get along, or rather tolerate each other. Alice has seen this." Carlisle seemed amused now.

I lost focus on their voices, then. The fire reentered my head.

It felt like years when the burning pain began to leave my body. It started with my fingertips, and my toes. Slower than the fire had engulfed me, it traveled up my limbs. Still, I was happy. The pain was leaving, and that was all that mattered in the world. I began to focus my mind again to get some sort of feedback from the outside world.

"I hope he's okay. Alice said he would wake within 24 hours. I hope he'll forgive me. Why did I ever have to let him into our house? He would not have to be suffering right now if I had not. I wonder if he would be back with his parents right now if I had not," Carlisle was talking. His words were continuous. They were also strange. They seemed to be kind of breathy like a whisper. I wondered if he was getting sick. I wondered if vampires could get sick.

I let my mind open a little more, and, now that I was listening, I could hear so many voices. Alice was sitting with Rosalie on the couch. They were talking about some new car Rosalie had bought. Jasper was sitting in the beanbag that I had seen him in that first day. He was talking to himself.

"I can't believe I agreed to Carlisle. Dang! Babysitter again? Why me? I just hope Alice will stay out of the way. Newborns are dangerous. Wonder what terrors this one will bring," he was saying in the same weird texture that Carlisle had to his voice.

I wrinkled my brow in confusion. Then I realized what I did. I had feeling in my forehead again. I had not been able to move it this whole time. Suddenly, my mind snapped back to my burning body. The pain was all through my torso and abdomen. My neck also had a slight burn, but it was nothing compared to what had just been there.

It was not too long after that when the burn began to focus on my heart. This time, I knew when I started to scream again. Carlisle went into a panic trying to comfort me. My heart was beating furiously, and trying to fight the horrible flames that were slowly killing me. Finally, with one last violent beat, my heart stopped.

My heart stopped? How? Were vampires supposed to not have a heartbeat? Did something go horribly wrong? I could not be dead, for I could hear Carlisle still. He was worrying.

"He should be waking up any second. What should I tell him? I can't go into this like I did the others, for he already knows what he is. I guess I'll just have to be surprised." He was talking in that whispery tone that sounded so confusing to me.

Instead of lying there in pain, however, I opened my eyes to see what was going on. It was wonderful. I could see clearly. It was as if I had taken off a dirty film over my eyes. I could also hear like I had never been able to before. I could hear the birds outside, and I could hear Jasper breathing downstairs.

I blinked, but it felt wrong. I did not have to, I realized. Breathing felt the same: unnecessary.

"Wow," I said.

I turned to Carlisle. This was amazing. I had been missing so much in my life.

He looked somewhat worried, and he looked at his watch. Obviously, something about it was surprising.

"Edward, stay here a moment, alright," he asked me.

I nodded.

"I'm going to be late for work, this is not good. Poor Edward. Ah well, Jasper and Esme will explain. No, Esme has things to do today. Jasper and Alice will explain. If Alice does not go shopping with Rosalie. At least I know Jasper will be here," he said in that whispery tone. I wrinkled my brow.

"Edward," he said in his regular voice. "I'm am so sorry, but I am going to be late for work. I'm sending Jasper up here to help your transition."

"Okay," I said. I was momentarily stunned. Was that actually me who said that? It sounded so much more smooth, and… better.

Carlisle left, and I heard him tell Jasper I was awake. Jasper groaned very slightly, and headed up the stairs, and into my room.


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter 11**

Jasper entered my room with a very agitated expression. He was muttering to himself. However, he frustrated me by talking in the whispery voice.

"Dang Carlisle," he cursed. "Who does he think I am? He needs to take care of his own stupid newborn."

Jasper sighed when he saw me standing there. As soon as I saw his face, I felt the need to defend myself. My thoughts scattered, and all that was left was an insane animal instinct. I had to focus it on killing the threat in front of me.

Unwillingly, I hunched over, and snarled at Jasper. I did not even register the fact that I had not known I could make the noise in the first place.

Suddenly, I felt instant calm wash over me. I heard some sort of something trigger by Jasper, and I was not sure what it was. However, the important thing was that I snapped out of the weird trance I had been in.

I looked at Jasper guiltily, and then down to my feet. "I'm sorry," I mumbled. I half expected him to come over to me and beat me down, but he did not.

Jasper was obviously struggling with this. I had no clue why he was saying it aloud (again it was in the whispery tone), but he was. I did not look up.

"I really hate this. What do I do with it? With Maria I had purpose. Now -"

I cut him off, looking up. "Who's Maria?"

Jasper looked outraged. "Did I say that aloud?"

This time, however, when he spoke, I was looking. I could see that his mouth did not move. My eyes got wide, and I took an involuntary step backwards. Again, I felt a sudden urge to do something, but this time it was to run. However, I did not. I kept myself grounded.

"How are you doing that," I asked him.

"Doing what," he said. Suddenly, he was very suspicious of me. He tensed, and I could hear him mentally preparing to restrain me. That was it! He was mentally preparing. Could vampires hear other people's minds?

"Can vampires read minds," I asked excitedly.

Jasper was very much bewildered by my sudden change in emotions. "It's not uncommon. Some vampires get powers and others don't." He answered me.

"Like Alice seeing the future," I asked, I was very excited now. This was amazing. I had to tell someone.

I ran downstairs. It was amazing at which the speed I ran. I did not want to stop when I got down there. I continued going. I found that I was going past things so fast, that I was momentarily amazed. How could I still see the bark of the trees so clearly? How could I still hear the birds over the roaring of the wind I had to be creating? It was exhilarating. I did not ever want to stop. So, I did not.

It was night when I finally realized that I did not know how far I had run. I stopped abruptly, again amazed at the ease of the action. However, I forced my mind back to the main focus. Where was I?

I could hear the slapping sound of water nearby, and when I breathed in I could smell salt. I was by the ocean. Which coast? In which country?

I froze, scared. I was lost. I could not find my way back to the Cullens, and who knew if they could find me. I was also just transformed into a vampire, and had no idea what that meant except that I could run freakishly fast, and had to drink blood.

I tried to think rationally, but I had a very small variety of options. I could stay where I was and wait for someone to find me. Surely they would be able to find me. I could smell everything very well, and I knew they had to be able to too.

Happy with finally having a partial plan, I sat down on the forest floor. My panic was now forgotten as I watched the forest.

_Jasper POV_

I cursed silently. Dang newborn! I was way out of practice when it came to watching them. I had been searching for him since he had run off, but he was lightning fast. I kept searching after dark, though. Carlisle would kill me if I returned home without his precious newborn.

I ran, trying to find him until it was a little after one in the morning. At that time, I found him sitting against a tree. He actually looked bored, but he hopped up excitedly when he sensed me there.

_Edward POV_

I heard Jasper long before he arrived, but my mind drifted in the time it took for him to get to me. Everything was distracting me. The sound of rustling leaves, the smell of the forest. It was so hard to focus on it all at once. It was like my mind could only focus on one thing at a time. It was frustrating, and as soon as I had heard and smelt everything, I grew bored. However, a new scent filled my nose shortly after. I looked up, and saw Jasper walking towards me warily. I hopped up with a huge smile on my face. It was so relieving to see him. However, my face quickly fell and I was suddenly fearful.

_The no good little freak,_ Jasper thought. _Did he just think he could run off and leave us like that? If he did, he has another thought coming._

I could tell, now, the waves of fear was coming off of him. He wanted me scared, but his thoughts gave no indication why.

In my fear, I began to back away from him. However, my fear intensified so much that I simply froze, wide eyed and stone faced.

Jasper growled at me, and lunged at me. I was still paralyzed. He had me on the ground in two seconds flat.

"You don't ever run away again," he growled. His face was a good foot away from mine, but it was too close for comfort. I felt threatened, and ready to fight him. "Do you understand?"

The rolling waves of fear decreased enough that I was not frozen with shock. I nodded quickly. He jumped off of me, and stood back with a glare.

I got up with one quick, easy action.

Jasper turned and was soon running. I followed close behind, surprised at how easily it was I caught up to him. I had not expected to be as fast as any of the others, but it was apparent that I was faster. I knew I could not leave his side, though. He was threatening me in his mind. I was not to leave his side unless I wanted to be torn apart.

We arrived home just as the sun was starting to rise. Alice and Carlisle ran out to greet us. Alice ran right into Jasper's arms, and gave him a sheepish look. She had told Carlisle what had happened. She felt guilty about it, but she had thought it was the right thing to do. Carlisle was not angry at all, just worried. Relief washed over his mind as soon as we were in sight.

"Are you two alright," he asked.

**Author's Note**: I'm so sorry I haven't posted for a long time. I've been busy with my book, blog, drawing, and school. Not to mention I've been trying to put in more effort with my friends. Play Day season is also coming up and my horse needs to be in shape for that. That means that I've been riding for two or more hours a day to put muscle in place of where fat has been on her all winter. It's exhausting. I finally got this chapter up for you all and I'm going to try to get the next one up tonight or tomorrow.


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter 12**

Jasper explained to Carlisle what had happened and I had told some of the parts that Jasper did not understand. Carlisle was only disappointed in himself. He was upset that he had not been here with Jasper to help control me.

The days went by. I learned about hunting (which turned out to be why my throat was burning). Carlisle and Jasper (Jasper mostly) taught me all sorts of things. I learned how to use my senses to the fullest effect. I was taken to see all sorts of things. Esme babied me, Rosalie ignored me, Emmet enjoyed wrestling with me (after I quit flinching and trying to get away from him, I found I was a very good fighter in addition to everything else I was now good at), Alice used me as a living Barbie doll, Jasper acted cold around me, and Carlisle shared stories with me from the hospital whenever he was home.

All in all, I was happy here. My human memories were faded to the point that I could remember I was beat in my human life and that I should probably seek revenge on my parents, but these memories barely bothered me.

My whole year as a newborn was light and happy like that. I never did feel close to Jasper during that year. I could see in his head that he just had a thing against newborns. He did not mean to, but he also shared with me why. I figured that he would accept me better when I was a more mature vampire. At least, that was what Alice told me.

It was a month after the year mark that I started feeling a sort of nagging in the back of my mind. I felt restless almost as if my very soul was yearning for something. I could not understand it. I was happier than I had ever been in my entire life. What was wrong with me?

Naturally, I went to Carlisle about this.

Before I even knocked on his study door, Carlisle called me in.

I entered Carlisle's study with an almost worried expression.

"What's wrong, Edward," Carlisle asked me. Concern etched his forehead and layered his thoughts.

"I don't know," I answered. "I feel incomplete somehow. I don't understand what it is."

Carlisle's mind immediately went to me happy with some young lady.

"No, no," I said, shaking my head. "I know it's not that. I hear those feelings in everyone's minds here. It's not that. It's something else. I feel like I need to do something, somehow.

"What do you mean Edward," Carlisle asked. _I can't read minds, you know_, Carlisle thought humorously.

"It's almost like that feeling when you've been away from the hospital for a vacation."

Carlisle's face showed recognition and understanding. "You probably have some sort of calling. There's a hobby out there you must have had as a human. Perhaps it was scrap booking, gardening…" His voice trailed off.

I thought a moment. My mind raced through everything that could have had and effect on me in a whole new life. It had to have been twenty seconds before my mind rested on something that I barely recognized. I knew it was a piano, but it took me a half second to figure out why the piano looked familiar. It had been my piano. My safe haven and I had poured my heart and soul into that thing. My soul seemed to ache for that feeling now.

"Edward," Carlisle asked questioningly.

"I do have a calling," I said excitedly. "My piano." Suddenly, my whole aura became darker. I felt like a vampire for the first time since I had been changed.

Those people that I was forced to call my parents had my precious instrument. The ones who had beat me senseless every night and every day. I had been feeling the need to take revenge, but it had never before been this strong.

"Edward," Carlisle said worriedly.

I forced myself to calm and keep my composure. I even gave a smile to Carlisle. "I'm going to go buy a piano. I'll be back when I find the right one," I said.

Carlisle rose. "Do you need someone to go with you," he asked. Concern for my control were at the forefront of his mind.

"I'll be fine." I told him, trying to put reassurance in my voice.

Concern was still there in his mind.

"I'll be back," I said. I left before he could say anything else to prevent me from leaving.

I left the house that day and tried to remember where it was I had lived. I knew I lived a good while from here, for I could remember my long journey from "home" and to the Cullens.

I ran in a Eastward direction as I tried to recall as many details as I could about my old life. Having been trying hard to keep these memories away and to accept my new, better life, I was having a hard time remembering anything about being a human.

It was on the edge of North Dakota state, that a memory suddenly floated into my mind. I stopped. Chicago, Illinois near the classier part of the city was where I had loosely called that house home. I could not remember the street, but two faces came to me so much clearer than they had since I had changed. They were sneering down at me, the man raising a knife over his head.

With a new found determination, I raced towards where I knew Chicago to be.


End file.
